Do you feel “stuck” in a difficult life transition? Do you want to get unstuck from a situation not working well for you?
Are you anxious from past traumas or about an uncertain future?
Are you struggling to be yourself in the face of pressure from others or society?
Do you feel like you’re walking on shaky ground due to past traumas, an uncertain future, or being forced to live someone else’s dream today? Do the events of recent years or other triggers keep hijacking you back to a traumatic experience that haunts the present? Does your life feels unsettled because of a job change, a relationship change. the loss of a loved one, or another difficult transition? Or does the ground feel shaky as you walk on eggshells–because people around you insist that you should be someone other than your true self?
Life Transitions
You’ve had a big change in your life, and the change might feel overwhelming. Even if it might be considered a positive change.
Maybe it was an unexpected change that caused turmoil, such as the death of a loved one, an unexpected health challenge, sudden unemployment, the end of a relationship. It’s never easy when these things happen, and it might not be easy to come to terms with the new world you find yourself in after such turmoil.
Or perhaps it was even a change you were looking forward to and planned ahead for. Perhaps it was a move to a different city, a diploma or academic degree, a new job, children, a marriage, retirement, or something else that seemed positive. It may have been something that you planned carefully for, or looked forward to. The surprising thing is that even changes perceived as positive and exciting can be unexpectedly difficult.
As a therapist, I have been through many such life changes myself. Through my studies, I’ve become familiar with many of the patterns that emerge with life changes and transitions. I will help you understand your feelings and work with you as you navigate your way through your transition.
Trauma
Trauma often gets in the way of working through challenging life transitions.
You want to live your life in the present, but something from the past keeps hijacking your life. You hear a certain sound, smell a certain smell, or see a person who resembles someone you’d rather forget, and suddenly you’re back THERE, at that traumatic event that won’t let you leave it behind. Perhaps your heart quickens, you feel flushed, or a chill crawls up your spine. A horrible memory or string of memories that won’t go away. You know intellectually that what happened to isn’t likely to happen again, but the “fight or flight” within you just won’t believe that.
I offer a number of tools to help you work through those traumas so that they can no longer haunt you. I am also trained in Eye Movement Desensitization and Reevaluation (EMDR), as well as relaxation exercises and other therapy modes.
Being Unapologetically Yourself
All you’ve ever wanted is to be yourself. But your personal definition of being yourself and others’ strong feelings about who you ought to be are very different. Sometimes it has felt like you’ve run into dozens of invisible electrical fences that would zap you everyone time you stepped outside of the box people have wanted you to stay in. Sometimes you didn’t even know that you were doing anything “wrong” but got zapped nevertheless.
These “fences” might have been your parents’ angry condemnation of you interests, aspirations, and dreams. Or perhaps they represent times that you’ve been shunned or faced the possibility of being shunned by family, friends, co-workers, or peers. You know how incredibly stressful it is to pretend to be someone you’re not. Yet, at the same time, the prospect stepping out of the box others want you to stay in is terrifying.
Whatever the reason, I provide an accepting safe space to help you work through what you’re dealing with. I will actively work with you to explore feelings about your challenges as well as ways to address them.
Life throws us many challenges. It’s unreasonable to expect ourselves to handle every single obstacle with skill, ease and grace. I provide an empathetic ear and help people figure out their own way through the wilderness.
My name is Haven McClure, MSW, CAPSW. I believe everyone, regardless of their situation, has been doing the best they can. Let’s discuss what’s working well for you, what can work better, and how you and I can best work together to work through your challenges.
